This Is An Adventure

by How I Became Invisible

/
1.
The moment's passed again, And the music gives the answers That we know we'll never say. So we go on in this apartment, The silence filling spaces That I brought with me. And this bottle's feeling sorry, And my stomach's feeling empty, And the moments just go on by. All the drinks are in the past tense And the words won't make a difference, So I guess we'll let them lie. Somehow, this doesn't mean a thing, This knowing that we're on a moving train To last year, and the old fears They just mean we're still the same. Starry eyes and sterile needles, We drink and then repeat it: The mistakes I'll make again. My stomach turns into a regret I am dressed in disappointment. Do you think you feel the same? Little pills and all the rest of Every hour I get the best of, It doesn't add up to a thing. I pass out and wake beside you In the empty hospital room, And I still don't feel a thing. Stay up later every night, I don't want a fight now every time That the silence eats our moments, And all our stars burn out and die. Another day, another distance, Another time I'll never miss this; Another slow decaying sunrise. And we'll drink ourselves to sleep and Wake up older and depleted. We don't sleep, We just close our eyes And count the stars In our empty bottled skies.
2.
Semi-sick sympathy; Close-eyed and braced for catastrophe; We are not the ones your parents warned you about last summer. Smiling and syncopating; Cold-eyed and hallucinating; Freeze the words faster than we can speak them. Can you see them? Here we go around again, And it's all I know. Here we go around again, And it's not what you said. All the fading fearless false final refrains we faced... I know why we go around. Main line, west and driving faster; Old eyes pray for disaster. Take the wheel, turn hard, and drive us closer To the wall we know we'd hit before we fall. Streetlights, burned out and fading. Your eyes are dead and waiting For the last breath to be broken and repeated one more time. Here we go around again, And it's all I know. Here we go around again, And it's not what you said. All the fading fearless false final refrains we faced... I know why we go around. Here we go around again And it's all I know. Here we go around again And it's not what you said. We go around, we go around, we go around. No matter what comes around, we go around.
3.
Last night, when I was barely sleeping, Your light was coming through in pieces, And I don't know why. I don't know why. So take this any way you want it. I'm not one to keep a secret. I like you. I like you. You can write this down or write me off. I never quite know when to stop. The winter's changing into spring again, And we're about to begin. Oh, my heart is barely beating, And I don't know where this is leading. And I don't know why, I don't know why, But I'm gonna try, I'm gonna try, 'Cause I like you. I like you.
4.
I got the message last night, Words and punctuation, A side-arm volley from the flank That caught me in the crossfire. Steadied my shaking hands, Despite the complication Of way too many amphetamines And a medicated head. It's been two weeks out on the front, It's a bad situation: Too little sleep, too little peace, And too many friends long gone away. I shouldered my rifle And prepared for evacuation. I left the note behind in wax, And left the words to burn. It said "This is not a warning, This is not a distress call, But my ship is in the harbor now, And I'm sailing out from shore. Don't blame the ocean, Don't blame anything at all. Don't blame yourself or blame the fight That's kept us far apart. I'm the captain of my vessel, And I'm tearing down this wall Of distance and relentless doubt between us, Until you see what I know now. You're drifting out at sea, And I'm waiting for the fall. If you return, you'll find me gone for good, So I leave you my heart At the bottom of the ocean, For you to keep behind your eyes. And remember, if you should return, The love you left behind." We stormed the bunker last night. I fought for my decisions. I didn't lose sight of her, And kept my love in mind. I was caught in the crossfire, My blood will leave with my conviction. And the words I speak under fire and smoke Will echo in our eyes: "We are the living, We are the dead who don't know why. We are the favored sons and daughters who Never knew to try."
5.
I float 820 million miles from where you are, And all these rings aren't company. I'm lonely here and you're so far away. Just saying "Hello." All these moons are jerks except for Titan (he just smells), So I sit silently just waiting for someone to come along someday. Hope I don't wait for too long... So I'll fly through the vacuum and hope you'll drop by to see me. I've run out of books and the conversation's poor, believe me. Maybe you could stay for tea or we could catch a movie? Anything you want to do I would be fine with, I'd be groovy. Wait, do people still say groovy? I haven't watched TV since back in 1982. And so I'll keep my ring crossed and orbit in my usual way. Maybe I'll hang out with Jupiter, I don't care that he's gay. And I'll send this note to you. I'll write an email too. Send a satellite photo through Saying "hello" to you. Saying "hello" to you.
6.
And I'm hoping this isn't the last time we see eye-to-eye. The hardest part of conversation is knowing just when it's too late to try To salvage connection, avoid complication, Check all the engines, assume the position, And let it go out with the ease that I'm assuming you smile. It's soft and it's sweet, and I'd love if I could keep You around through tomorrow, so I could sing you to sleep. We'll bury our fears deep beneath all the words we reply, And try to outlast all the lovers and losers we've kissed and have hung out to dry. The past is the prelude, tonight is me and you Making our way through the minefields we've let loose In whispers and wavering moments we just won't let die. It's soft and it's sweet, and I'd love if I could keep You around through tomorrow, so I could sing you to sleep. I take one last look at the reflection of light in your eyes. It's later and darker than we planned to stay, but it's easy to lose track of time. It slips and it shivers and then it delivers The answer we dreaded but knew would be given. So I swallow hard and choke out a silent goodbye. So kiss me one last time. It's soft and it's sweet, and I'd love if I could keep You around through tomorrow, so I could sing you to sleep.
7.
I guess I'm tired of this running, this running around Back to where I've been coming from, feet on the ground. It's not like it's living, sticking to safety nets, Still so unforgiving; maybe tomorrow I'll get... And I am so tired I can barely hear you coming in Tonight. So we spin in our circles, and turn back again Looking for a purpose and a way to fit in. Must've lost all our memories and left them behind In the blink of a moment and a last sunrise. And I am so tired I can barely hear you coming in. These lights are so bright, I can barely see you; are we all right Tonight? And I am so tired I can barely hear you coming in. These lights are so bright, I can barely see you; are we all right? And I am so tired... I guess I'm just tired of this running, This running around.

credits

released January 1, 2009

How I Became Invisible is:
N. Reed - vocals, guitar, bass
Additional guitars and drums by Ian D Bennet.

Music and lyrics: N Reed

Recorded at Moshi Moshi Studios. Produced by Ian D Bennet.

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How I Became Invisible Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

songs about science, sadness, anger, and transition. we're all in this together. so raise your fist and start to sing.

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